FUCK YOU to the people that leave the toilet seat down in public toilets.

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I don’t need a fucking turd surprise jumping out at me when I lift the lid! I have to surf my way through the cubicles to find a “safe” one. Here’s a tip. If you’ve done a massive shit and

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2 Comments Add yours

  1. Agatha Aliferis says:

    OMG, I love you, I think I have found my soul mate. Pity I’m married, my husband wouldn’t take too kindly to being ditch for someone funnier than him!

  2. elleysays says:

    You breathed “I am your mother” in a Darth Vader voice to your kid. That is hilarious!

    I have a few fuck yous and I think you should open them up to the public.

    Fuck you people that walk in groups side by side on the pavement so no one can pass. Just because you’re feeling leisurely doesn’t mean everyone else in the world has no where else to be

    Fuck you people that are walking on the pavement or in the supermarket in front of you and then stop suddenly without warning. I should walk in to you just to teach you a lesson. You actual idiot. Disclaimer: sometimes I actually do

    Fuck you Coles and Woolworths employees who, when I ask if there is more of a product out back, just start walking away from me. Supposedly towards out back. HELLO? WHERE ARE YOU GOING? WAS THAT A YES? ARE YOU COMING BACK? HOW LONG AM I SUPPOSED TO WAIT HERE?

    Fuck you to the 3 Target employees in a row who told me that target doesn’t sell baskets. Um. Yes you fucking do. You have two whole aisles of them. Why did I have to discover that myself? What are they paying you your $3 an hour for?

    And fuck you to the Facebook crusaders of causes that they don’t actually do anything to actively support. I don’t actually want to see dismembered animals or slaughtered elephants on my news feed as I’m chowing down on dinner after a long day at work. If you care, why don’t you actually do something about it. Send money to a charity. Volunteer somewhere. Assist police in capturing the culprits. It’s gross.

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