Fuck You, Online Mother’s Groups.

I’ve been a shit stirrer since I was a little girl. I can’t help it. I like to have a laugh.

As a kid I was kicked out of the classroom a lot. One time because I put thumb tacks on my most hated teachers chair. You see, his bum was so flat that legend had it he didn’t actually have a bum at all. And I needed to find out for certain.

He jumped. He had a bum. 

In High School, one teacher actually refused to have me back in the maths class ever again for talking too much. I had to teach myself year ten maths in the quadrangle for most of the year. And I think I did a better job of teaching myself! 

Years later with the invention of Facebook, I would go on to get kicked out of a few Facebook groups for being a shit stirrer. All in the name of good fun mind you. So not much has changed. 

I got kicked out of a Sydney based mums group for changing my name to Far Kew and asking about where I could get circumcised in Fiji. That’s now the stuff of legend, and you can read about it sometime.  Just don’t sniff around and join the group, I’m tired of them riding on my coat tails *chortle*. 

The other time I’ve been kicked out of a Facebook mothers group is when I joined one for people who used Modern Cloth Nappies. I’m actually struggling to remember why I was booted, perhaps I broke a small rule or messed up an acronym. I really don’t remember. But what I do remember is thinking how the fuck does one get kicked out of a group full of mums using cloth nappies to better the environment. WOW. I am such a BADASS.

Mother’s groups on Facebook can be really fucking mean places. The bigger they are the scarier places they can be. You’ll feel really left out if you are not complaining about the price of your cleaner, sharing your veggie slice recipe or humble bragging about your fucking fondant cake.  If you are not into active wear and prancing around with your camel toe poking out while you pick up the kids from school, then you might find it’s a bit of a rough place to hang out. You might start wondering if you have enough designer clothes in your wardrobe, or if you should be getting a leg up on the property ladder. Even if you can’t afford it.

And, if you are unlucky enough to post something a little controversial, knowingly or not, you’ll be jumped on by the wild ones like a pack of hungry wolves. They will take you down.  They won’t care if you’d had a bad day, were suffering from depression or just needed someone to talk to. They won’t bother to find out if you hadn’t slept for months or were getting a divorce. They will eat you alive.

The thing is, women can be bitches. It’s in our DNA. Women in large groups are even more bitchy. Because they feed off each others meanness. And in some of these groups there is no room for a bit of Far Kew. Haha Oh well. I’ll sob about that when I am busy writing my book. 

But there is hope. I happen to know some really special ladies. I’m in some groups on Facebook that nobody would know about unless I told them. And that’s not to be exclusive, quite the contrary. It’s to get the village it takes to raise a child. Because that simply doesn’t exist anymore in our modern world, we’ve lost our tribes. And that can make being a mum really, really, hard. 

We can talk about ANYTHING. Politics, books, vaccination, circumcision, and cake. And we are not all from the same walks of life, we don’t always share the same opinion and we don’t necessarily agree with each other 100% of the time.

Between this handful of beautiful ladies, some of whom I’ve never met, I’ve been able to get through some super tough times. I honestly don’t know what I would have done without their support. We’ve had births, deaths, disease, rehab, premature babies, divorce, big moves, new businesses and brain surgery to name just a few hot topics. We joke about riding the wild salami, Tim Robards’ droopy ball sack, highly competitive mums, butlers pantries and hangovers.

If you are a bit of a black sheep like me, you need to take action. Find your friends in the most unlikely corners. Unearth those unexpected friendships with people you may have known before. Start your own mini tribe and don’t worry about if it only has 4 people in it.  Just make it people that are cool like you. 

And kick the bitchy groups to the curb. Because google will find you a hotel in Fiji, a sensibly priced cleaner in your suburb and a recipe for chicken pie that freezes well. 

THE END

Don’t miss my next rant! Click that big ass “like” box down the bottom of this page. 

996 comments

  1. Nice post. I used to be checking constantly this blog and I’m impressed!
    Very useful info specifically the ultimate section :
    ) I care for such info much. I was looking for this certain info for a very long time.
    Thank you and best of luck.

  2. Wow that was unusual. I just wrote an really long comment but after I clicked
    submit my comment didn’t show up. Grrrr…
    well I’m not writing all that over again. Regardless, just wanted
    to say excellent blog!

  3. Hello there, You have done a great job. I’ll certainly digg it
    and personally recommend to my friends. I am confident they will be benefited from this site.

  4. Hola! I’ve been reading your web site for a while now
    and finally got the courage to go ahead and give you a shout out
    from Huffman Texas! Just wanted to tell you keep up the good job!

  5. I do consider all the concepts you have introduced for
    your post. They’re very convincing and can definitely work.
    Still, the posts are too brief for beginners. May just
    you please lengthen them a bit from subsequent time?
    Thanks for the post.

  6. Thank you for any other informative blog. The place else
    may I get that kind of info written in such an ideal method?
    I have a challenge that I am simply now running on, and I’ve been on the glance out for such information.

  7. Hi there would you mind letting me know which hosting company you’re working with?

    I’ve loaded your blog in 3 completely different browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot quicker then most.
    Can you recommend a good web hosting provider at a honest price?
    Many thanks, I appreciate it!

  8. Hey there I am so happy I found your site, I really found you
    by error, while I was searching on Google for something else, Anyhow I am here now
    and would just like to say thank you for a incredible post
    and a all round enjoyable blog (I also love the theme/design), I don’t have
    time to browse it all at the minute but I have saved it and
    also included your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read more,
    Please do keep up the fantastic work.

  9. Today, I went to the beachfront with my kids. I found a sea
    shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She put the shell
    to her ear and screamed. There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear.

    She never wants to go back! LoL I know this is completely off topic but I had to tell someone!

  10. I am not sure where you are getting your information,
    however good topic. I must spend a while
    finding out much more or understanding more. Thank you for excellent information I used to be in search of this
    info for my mission.

  11. Hello just wanted to give you a quick heads up and let you know
    a few of the pictures aren’t loading properly. I’m not
    sure why but I think its a linking issue. I’ve tried
    it in two different browsers and both show the same
    outcome.

  12. Right here is the perfect site for anybody who wants to find out about this topic.
    You realize a whole lot its almost hard to argue with you (not that I personally would want to…HaHa).

    You certainly put a fresh spin on a topic which has been written about for
    years. Great stuff, just wonderful!

  13. My spouse and I stumbled over here by a different web page and thought I may as well
    check things out. I like what I see so now i’m following you.
    Look forward to looking at your web page for a second time.

  14. I don’t know if it’s just me or if everyone else encountering problems with your
    site. It appears as if some of the text on your posts are running off the screen.
    Can somebody else please provide feedback and let me
    know if this is happening to them too? This might be
    a problem with my internet browser because I’ve had this happen previously.
    Cheers

  15. Howdy would you mind letting me know which webhost you’re using?

    I’ve loaded your blog in 3 different browsers and I must say this
    blog loads a lot quicker then most. Can you suggest a good hosting provider at a honest price?
    Thanks, I appreciate it!

  16. We absolutely love your blog and find most of your post’s to be what precisely I’m looking for.
    Does one offer guest writers to write content for yourself?
    I wouldn’t mind publishing a post or elaborating on some of the subjects you write about here.
    Again, awesome web log!

  17. Have you ever thought about writing an e-book or guest authoring on other websites?
    I have a blog centered on the same ideas you discuss and would love to have you share
    some stories/information. I know my viewers would appreciate your
    work. If you are even remotely interested, feel free to
    send me an email.

  18. I think that what you said made a great deal of sense. However,
    consider this, what if you added a little information? I ain’t saying your content is not good, however suppose you added a title to maybe get a person’s
    attention? I mean Fuck You, Online Mother’s Groups.
    – Fuck You Friday is kinda boring. You could glance at Yahoo’s home page and
    note how they create article titles to get viewers
    to open the links. You might add a video or a related pic or two to grab readers
    interested about everything’ve got to say. In my opinion, it might
    make your website a little livelier.

  19. Howdy I am so thrilled I found your weblog, I really found you by mistake,
    while I was browsing on Digg for something else, Regardless I am here now and would just like to say thanks for a remarkable post and a all
    round entertaining blog (I also love the theme/design), I don’t have time
    to read it all at the minute but I have bookmarked it and
    also added your RSS feeds, so when I have time I
    will be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the excellent work.

  20. Thank you for another magnificent article. The
    place else may anyone get that kind of information in such a perfect means of writing?

    I’ve a presentation subsequent week, and I’m at the look for
    such info.

  21. Наша группа профессиональных мастеров находится в готовности предъявить вам актуальные средства, которые не только подарят прочную защиту от холода, но и подарят вашему коттеджу оригинальный вид.
    Мы работаем с последовательными составами, сертифицируя продолжительный срок службы работы и отличные эффекты. Утепление фасада – это не только экономия на обогреве, но и заботливость о экологической обстановке. Экологичные разработки, какие мы внедряем, способствуют не только жилищу, но и сохранению природы.
    Самое основополагающее: Утепление стен снаружи цена у нас стартует всего от 1250 рублей за метр квадратный! Это бюджетное решение, которое сделает ваш жилище в фактический тепловой уголок с минимальными тратами.
    Наши труды – это не единственно утепление, это образование помещения, в где каждый деталь показывает ваш персональный манеру. Мы рассмотрим все твои желания, чтобы преобразить ваш дом еще более приятным и привлекательным.
    Подробнее на ppu-prof.ru/
    Не откладывайте заботу о своем жилище на потом! Обращайтесь к мастерам, и мы сделаем ваш корпус не только комфортнее, но и стильнее. Заинтересовались? Подробнее о наших проектах вы можете узнать на сайте компании. Добро пожаловать в пределы уюта и уровня.

  22. Hi everybody, here every person is sharing such knowledge,
    therefore it’s fastidious to read this webpage,
    and I used to pay a visit this blog all the time.

  23. This design is steller! You definitely know how to keep a reader entertained.
    Between your wit and your videos, I was almost moved to start
    my own blog (well, almost…HaHa!) Wonderful job. I really enjoyed what you had to say, and more
    than that, how you presented it. Too cool!

  24. Good post. I learn something new and challenging on sites I stumbleupon every
    day. It’s always interesting to read through articles from other authors
    and practice a little something from their web sites.

  25. Undeniably believe that which you said. Your favorite justification appeared to be
    on the net the easiest thing to be aware of. I say to you,
    I certainly get irked while people consider worries that they
    plainly do not know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top and also defined out the whole thing without having
    side effect , people could take a signal. Will likely be back to get more.
    Thanks

  26. Po wyłączeniu większości telefonów komórkowych zniesione zostanie ograniczenie dotyczące wprowadzania nieprawidłowego hasła.W tym momencie można wejść do systemu poprzez odcisk palca, rozpoznawanie twarzy itp.

  27. Click here for the Penguins full schedule. A straightforward look at the day’s top news in 20 minutes. Powered by ABC News. Hosted by Brad Mielke. Lindholm, who scored the go-ahead goal during the Flames’ season-opening win, is in a contract year. Whether he signs an extension in Calgary or hits the open market, he has plenty of motivation to return to the 40-goal plateau he reached in 2021-22. © 2024 Game & Wildlife Conservation Trust A straightforward look at the day’s top news in 20 minutes. Powered by ABC News. Hosted by Brad Mielke. PITTSBURGH (AP) — Evgeni Malkin had a goal and an assist during a five-goal third-period surge and the Pittsburgh Penguins beat the Calgary Flames 5-2 on Saturday night. Get quick answers from PPG Paints Arena staff and past visitors. Today’s breaking news and more in your inbox
    https://original.misterpoll.com/users/5411750
    Big Ant Studios and Nacon are thrilled to announce that the long-awaited Cricket 22: The Official Game of The Ashes will arrive this November. A true next-generation effort that builds on the massive success of Cricket 19, Cricket 22 will deliver the most robust, substantial game of cricket that fans have ever seen. On the Big Cash app, you can play the game and earn real money. If your goal is to win cash online while having some fun then this Cricket game is the perfect game for you. Not only the game ends in less than 10 minutes, but it also gives you the results immediately. You can play against real players, compete with them and check how well you can play the cricket game.  Our Walkabout Wickets symbol by Kirrae Whurrong artist Fiona Clarke (b.1963), represents cricket stars past, present and future, and the meeting places where they play. Aunty Fiona is a descendant of James ‘Mosquito’ Couzens. He and his brother Jonny Couzens were members of the first Australian cricket team ever to tour England – in 1868.

  28. Мы служба SEO-экспертов, специализирующихся на повышении посещаемости и рейтинга вашего сайта в поисковых системах.
    Мы получили признание за свою работу и хотим поделиться с вами нашим опытом и навыками.
    Какая помощь доступна у нас:
    сео карточки валберис
    • Тщательный анализ вашего сайта и разработка персональной стратегии продвижения.
    • Оптимизация контента и технических аспектов вашего сайта для максимальной эффективности.
    • Регулярное отслеживание и анализ результатов, с целью постоянного улучшения вашего онлайн-присутствия.
    Подробнее https://seo-prodvizhenie-ulyanovsk1.ru/
    У наших клиентов уже есть результаты: увеличение трафика, улучшение позиций в поисковых системах и, конечно же, рост прибыли. Мы готовы предложить вам консультацию бесплатно, для обсуждения ваших потребностей и разработки стратегии продвижения, соответствующей вашим целям и финансовым возможностям.
    Не упустите шанс улучшить свои результаты в интернете. Свяжитесь с нами сегодня же.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.